A few months ago, I had a few dreams that had me react in a manner I don’t want to return to. The main dream I remember was the one where I saw friends from a distance from church walking somewhere with a hill. The look on their face had a reflective concern. They meet up with a person, a woman, who I met while in seminary. It was two parts of my life coming together without one knowing the other. Now, I believe a while later after the dream two friends of mine showed up to the mall where I worked, and one told me the other is getting married and I had to guess. I was in a congratulatory mood afterwards, but later I was feeling down because of how I was at the moment. I didn’t feel bad that the two was getting married. I was down because of what I didn’t do in the past. Most of the time, I didn’t say how I felt, and I didn’t take risks when it came to trying to date women. I felt like I missed out. How wrong I am.
The whole sequence of events was trippy. I wished I was in a better position according to my view, when it came to relationships, work, and education, whatever at my age. Was this an early stage of mid-life crisis? Nah. I was just down for a while plus there were a lot of things I didn’t close the chapter to. They happened to come up when the sequence of events happened. So, I thought about it all, tried to figure out why the dream came about, and did my best to make amends with myself.
Around one or two weeks later, I had another dream, and in it, a young woman was interacting with me, and I was annoyed by it. I asked her what she wanted, and she replied that she wanted to get to know me. I thought she was getting on my nerves, but it was just her way of getting to know me. And she looked like a woman I would have nothing to do with, we were on two different sides of the fence, we would most likely not be into the same things, she is not my type, I shouldn’t be hers, and I’m making a lot of excuses. I was very shallow, thinking I was better than the young woman in the dream and who she represents. After the dream, I did a bit of reflection, and I viewed it as expanding the horizon. When it comes to personality, I must be open to different types. I shouldn’t think anyone is superior/ inferior based on personality. And I’ve been told for ages that opposites attract, so I’ll take note of it. I have my reservations on a few things, but I think life would be boring if I was continuously around someone who had the same personality as I did. I’m thankful for the dreams and the experience(s) I had that opened up these lessons.
And I’m just getting started.