Something, 2/22/23.

Last year, I wrote a simple message at the end of my post, which basically said for men not to put their hands on women. A while before I wrote that, I was told that someone I’m close to had put hands on his (former) significant other. When I found out, I was disappointed because I know a bit of his character. This person may want to have things his way or think they don’t have to take any real responsibility, but it shouldn’t give him permission to put hands on a woman, especially when he wasn’t raised to do such things.

I don’t know where he got the idea to hit women from. It’s possible that he was influenced by the music he listened to/ movies he watched. It could be possible that he was influenced by the lifestyle he saw in entertainment. It could be possible that he was influenced by the lifestyle he wanted to live. I truly don’t know. I can only guess.

There are men out there who have the charm, the game, the swagger to attract women, but how they treat women afterward is a turn-off. There are men out there who have the finances, the employment, and proper habitation that screams stability, but something is going on in their head that is off. I don’t know how true the stories are of how the guy was nice in the beginning but later on he becomes either possessive or controlling or a combination of both. These dudes are able to get the ladies, but I don’t know what’s going on in their head to use things like physical harm to be in control of the situation. Now, I want to build to have the finances, the employment, the habitation, but I hope being possessive and controlling doesn’t come with it. The messed-up part is that I could be one of those dudes. I have “daddy” issues and things I fully haven’t dealt with from my past, but I know that there will be consequences if I lash out. Maybe I’ll get therapy when I get in a relationship.

And I’m not putting down men who are charming or have proper stability. I’m not condoning those who physically express their frustration towards women, whether or not they seem to be well off. It seems like men don’t show any signs of being abusive until something throws them off. Alcohol is an example of that. If alcohol is a problem, some dudes will bring out their Mr. Hyde on the ones they’re closest to, and that’s not good. It’s easy to say women should immediately get away from the abuse if they no longer want to experience it, but there’s a psychological element that makes it complicated. I had a few women I tried to form a relationship with, and later on they showed their other side through shouting at me over something small or telling me what to do. ought to do, and I ended up ghosting them/ not communicating with them anymore. If I can’t take that mess, I can’t imagine what women experience with dudes wanting to intimidate them.

With all that I’m hearing about and learning, I must evaluate myself and see if I have any ticks in me that are harmful to women or the ones closest to me. I have been overbearing towards my younger brother and them, but I have calmed down since then because it was bad to put that on him, and I have to live with that. I want us as men to learn how to treat women, but before that we must learn that how we treat others should be a result of how we treat ourselves. If we treat ourselves right, is it messed up to treat others foul? I think so. Again, I’ll say to the women, men ought not to put their hands on them.

BLM

Brandon’s Poetry Corner, 8/22/16.

Disclaimer: Originally posted on Facebook on 6/30/14.

 

Even From Flies (Working Title)

4/29/14

Mrs. Miller saw redness on my back

 

And said she’s not having any of that.

 

She called child protective services

 

And that made my father nervous.

 

He tried to dodge them, but he couldn’t.

 

He was doing things other fathers wouldn’t.

 

Some people came and took me away

 

And asked me how it got this way.

 

Well, my mommy died when I was 3.

 

By then, he didn’t take anger out on me.

 

When I got a new “mother,” his anger came out.

 

She left because she was tired of the bouts.

 

After that, he started to hit me,

 

Scream at me, saying, “It’s your fault!”

 

At night, I would lie in bed and cry.

 

He became a monster. I didn’t know why.

 

Now, Mrs. Miller checks on me every day.

 

My father has been sent away.

 

My father had some coping problems

 

And didn’t know how to solve them.

 

Child protective services sent me to family

 

Who wept when they found out I was being abused.

 

They don’t have children, although they try.

 

If they do, I’ll protect them, even from flies.

 

Thanks to my teacher, I have been saved.

 

This weekend, I’ll go and see my mommy’s grave.

 

http://chfs.ky.gov/dcbs/dpp/childsafety.htm

http://www.pcaky.org/

Brandon’s Poetry/ Writing Corner, 6/6/16.

Disclaimer: posted on Facebook on 4/30/14.

 

Susan

I can’t believe Susan did what she did.

I’m struck with awe of the courage she hid.

As frail as Susan is, she has much might,

had me on the ground for a while tonight.

And I’m the one who ruled with an iron fist.

If I wanted something done, she got the gist.

I made sure I was the man of the house

From the bills to the behavior of my spouse.

I met Susan one night at a bar inebriating.

The friends she was with were intimidating.

I got her number and we dated for as few months.

We got hitched in the court shortly after that.

I was to work; she was to stay at home

And take care of matters before I hit the doormat.

When we went out, we were less in public’s view.

I was suspicious of who she was talking to.

I remember when I first struck Susan in the eye,

All because she was talking to another guy.

My reaction was something she didn’t expect

And all I wanted from her was respect.

I “apologized” after her wailing and cradling.

After that, the arguments encouraged the enabling.

I pulled back around the time she was with child,

But I still let her know not to go and run wild.

One night, I struck her. On the stairs she fell.

She went to work the next day bruised, but covered it well.

The shouting matches were in the living room, her choice.

My views came out strong when I raised my voice.

She made sure our son didn’t hear any noise

By putting him to bed early next to his stuffed toys.

And her family didn’t know what was going on.

When they called, I would tell them that she’s gone.

I also kept her away from her friends.

I made sure I was the only one she needed.

I worked hard on her frail personality

Whether I physically or verbally succeeded.

I came home late after being at the bar,

Mad at my boss and the ticket on my car.

Susan was waiting in the front when I walked in.

With a small voice, she asked me where I have been.

Her question raised my anger, and I struck her.

I was so mad, and someone had to suffer.

I continued to beat her in a relentless spat.

She said she had enough and went for a bat.

I can’t believe Susan did what she did.

I’m struck with awe of the courage she hid.

As frail as Susan is, she has much might,

had me on the ground for a while tonight.

Now, I’m in handcuffs, quiet as a mouse

Because she called 9-1-1 from a neighbor’s house.

She should be in the back of this police car instead

Because she’s the one who took a bat to my head.

Her father arrives, threatening me with a shotgun.

(The) Police apprehend him before any damage was done.

With everything that’s going on, I see my son…

… being held by his mother. His face is cradled into her bosom, and the back of his head faces me. I sit in the back of this car and realize I’m alone, and I won’t be hurting Susan or anyone else.

 

www.kdva.org

http://www.aardvarc.org/dv/states/kydv.shtml

http://chfs.ky.gov/dcbs/dpp/violenceprevention.htm